O, What a Beautiful Mornin' O, What a Beautiful Day

YESTERDAY WAS A DAY OFF - MLK Day - and I spent it

• Listening to the radio station that replayed King’s speeches 
• Exercising some 
• Being lazy some 
• At the eye doctor - 20 minutes and 
• Trading my way-too-big car in on a smaller car - 4 hours. 

I AM GOING TO JUSTIFY SPENDING THIS MONEY -

• The CX7 Mazda was a good car for the winter road in Pennsylvania. It has engine assets that made driving on snowy or icy (or snowy and icy) roads possible. Once, when I had to pull over to let an emergency vehicle go past me, I was able to go up hill, out of the ice and get back on the road with no problem. This was something that my beloved New Beetle, 8 years old when she died, would have strained to do. 
• When driving at night, I never worried that I would hit a deer or a bear as I was driving because the SUV was big enough to take the hit, sez she. 
• As I prepared to travel from PA to New Mexico, I knew the cats would have sufficient room to move around a bit. They had been cramped when in the VW we drove from Colorado to Pennsylvania. 

     THE MAZDA WAS STURDY, it was safe, it was UGLY. And so big that I felt lost in it. So I have been doing some shopping to see what would replace this vehicle - miles per gallon were prime consideration right up there with safety. Gotta have both.

     A FRIEND’S ADVICE? Pick fun over sturdy.

     PRE-PURCHASE WORK - I had looked online at other cars suitable for someone my age, and they were not exciting. But do-able. I went to a Honda dealer last week, and the salesperson was uninspiring and must have decided I was not a viable purchaser, though I was dressed in work clothes, because he dismissed me.

      YESTERDAY morning, on my way back from the eye doctor, I stopped at a Nissan dealer to look at what they had and drove out with a
USED MINI COOPER!
     One year old, and cute as a bug. Fun to drive, great gas mileage, lots of airbags. Lifted my spirits right away.
    
     Often, rather than spend money, I look to God (FREE) to lift my spirits - it is what ministers do.
    
     SOME PEOPLE ARE NOT SO FORTUNATE. Nothing - not a car, not God, not a kind voice - lifts their spirits. A member of my congregation just brought me a book for our church library: Wound 328 by Sue Lynch. The book is the story of a woman who lived with misdiagnosed Bipolar Disorder. She eventually committed suicide. I did not know the woman, but I do know others who live a sad life overshadowed by depression. My heart breaks for those who must face darkness so much of their lives. In my optimistic youth, I used to think that anyone could just change their outlook, jump out of bed, feel good and get on with it. Experience with friends has taught me otherwise.

     This morning at the end of my prayer time, I asked God to fill me with the Holy Spirit and have that Holy Spirit energize me for the day. I know that almost every day is bright as I live with the outlook of a glass-half-full. Then I came to church and the women in the craft group lifted my spirits. Later, it is sermon prep time and that is always a positive experience. Then two cats welcome me home. So much positive in my life, so much to be thankful for. May I always remember and thank God for all my graces and blessings.

Doing What Comes Naturally

Whoever said that ministry was an easy job – I know people who think it is – need to walk in my shoes for a few days. Ministry, especially a specialized ministry such as church planting and church revitalization is tough. Not a job for the feint of heart. I think I heard that from some people when I chose this path, but somehow knew that I could succeed where others had not. After four years of this life, here is what I have learned: First, the selection tests that ask over and over if I can take rejection need to put me (the candidate) out in a field, make it a driving rain that is cold and wet, take away all food, shelter and supports, leave me there for two weeks and then ask me to volunteer to go back out for a few more days. If I say yes, I will go then perhaps – maybe - I have the stuff it takes to face the adversities that are inherent whenever a church is built from the ground up or when long-time members of a church have (knowingly) voted to go for revitalization. Second: building from the ground up is far easier, because the only person that has to be pleased is the church planter. All who join the church as it is taking root and growing are coming because they like what the planting pastor has to offer. Coming to a church that has been hurt and split more times than the members can count is tough. Rather than listen to my own good sense about what to do and when to do it, I listen to the tired members who have lost hope as they try to go backwards. There was comfort in the way things “used to be” though when these good folk look around and don’t see their friends, they do realize that change has already taken place. Three: Change is unpleasant. The change that has occurred in the church was unpleasant – good friends died, others moved to warmer climates to be with children, still others found comfort in a church that offered a choir that was wonderful (leaving the choir behind they had belonged to) or found a new preacher who seemed to talk directly to them. Whatever the reason, some dear friends left while others stuck it out and continue to stay even if there appears to be little hope of new growth. That is when they call me: When there appears to be no hope. They want me to bring them back to life – to re-vitalize WITHOUT CHANGE because change is uncomfortable, scary, it may not work and we may fail. Darn, I know that. It is scary for me too. I too wish that things could be as they were before. Here is a contemporary example: I approach each new cell phone the same way. It is scary – I knew the old phone and what worked on it and what did not. I knew that I could not text on that phone because it was not “smart” and now church gurus want all of us in the church building field to text a lot – to Twitter – to FB and there are a couple of new terms. I liked it when I was as smart as the phone – somewhat like my congregation liked it when they were in the church of the 1950s. But neither the not-so-smart phone nor the old-time religion is viable. So I lead us forward with only theory to guide me. And God above me, God beside me, God below me, God to my right and God to my left and most of all God in front of me. I could say heaven help us, but I know that heaven already is.

A wedding of sorts

This afternoon, I was installed as Pastor of the congregation I am called to serve. This is huge, at least for me. In order to be installed, we dated, had an engagement, an engagement party, a shower and finally a wedding. In church pastor terms, it went like this The dating -- we danced a bit together when I was one of the candidates invited to pursue the application process. The committee charged with selecting a candidate to present to the congregation sent me an email: please respond to the following 20 questions - submit your answers on a DVD (in order to do that, I had to purchase a DVD recorder and record myself talking). So, I did and sent it off - within days, I was invited to send a sample sermon. I believe sample sermons should be current and was able to send a copy of one I did at a pulpit exchange the following week. It was not the best recording, but was as good as I could do in the time frame. Then came the Skype interview - this was my favorite part because I got to meet and know some of the committee for the first time. They were earnest, articulate and asked intelligent questions. Most of all, they were enthusiastic about revitalizing this church - which was what drew me to them in the first place since I believe we need to revitalize church if church is to survive. The engagement - The committee liked what I had to say, and I liked them - I was invited to come to NM to preach a candidating sermon, to be shown around and to meet the people in the Skype window, the Church Council and the congregation at three separate times. They were wonderful and I could see that a marriage between us could work. Sunday's sermon went well, and I was voted in. The engagement party - started on my first day as pastor pastor of St. Paul's United Church of Christ, Rio Rancho NM. I was not installed, but called, that is hired but only as a temp since at the denomination level my credentials had been examined but the denomination wanted to know more about me before giving the Good Housekeeping Seal of Approval. A good thing in this day of clergy misconduct. The shower - I guess the shower is when the Conference Minister tells me that my previous Conference had good things to say about me and that, if I passed one more committee, COCAM, I would be vetted. The gift is the Seal of Approval. a good gift since it means I am approved to work in the Southwest Conference United Church of Christ. Finally, the wedding. Today was the wedding. The final vows, as it were. We celebrated this with a service and a dinner (churches are known for worship and eating, right?) this afternoon. Earlier in the day, people asked me if I was excited - I was not. I was overwhelmed with the responsibility I was assuming. I am to take this congregation from a slow death to a congregation with a viable future. This is heady This is frightening. People look to me with hope of growth, but they also look to me as a pastor who won't make them uncomfortable. I almost did not go through with the wedding ceremony. My feeling about marriage and divorce is that marriage should be at least as difficult to obtain as a divorce would be. If I fail to inspire the congregation, if I fail in the attempt to bring us from slow death to slow life, if I lead us off a cliff many will be disappointed. I look in the mirror and tremble. Even before this marriage began, I knew that the would ask me to do things that will not lead them out of the downward spiral. And they have already: please don't change anything. Don't ask us to sing different music; don't ask us to pray differently; do sermons like the pastor we had in the 9160s did. Give us a good message but don't challenge us. My challenge every week is for them to find ways to be Jesus people in this world. It is pretty scary especially if you have been in a church for forty or fifty years that only asked you to give money. It is easier to give money than to give yourself. In my most hopeful moments, I feel God is calling this congregation to be around in ten years and longer - becoming vital, enthusiastic, engaging the Bible and working to be Jesus folk in our communities. We have hard work ahead. The honeymoon is about to begin!

Back Seat To God

It is time for me to stand up and say out loud that I am a member of St. Paul’s Rio Rancho United Church of Christ. This is the first step of a couple that lead to my installation as pastor of this congregation. Reflecting on this step, I am aware that joining anything except Facebook in this current social climate is iff-y if not downright suspicious. Joining often means that the joiner will receive emails from an automatic email generator and will never be free of too many emails that arrive each day. In Pennsylvania I shopped online when I found it difficult to go car-shopping since each small town around the county and in towns located in PA and NY sported one dealer. If I wanted to try a Ford, I needed to travel to Wellsboro; if I wanted a Subaru, to Mansfield, a Madza to Montoursville, a Toyota in Ithaca or a Nissan in some other city in New York. After much searching, I purchased a car last January and moved in the summer to New Mexico. Although I remembered to unsubscribe before leaving PA, I still receive automatically generated emails letting me know that if I just drive a bit, I can see a car in Syracuse or Baltimore! Joining seems to mean that tentacles of an octopus wrap around me and threaten to squeeze me like a boa constrictor if I try to get away. Several weeks ago, I looked at a home to purchase. Here is how I went about it. Prior to my purchase, I spent much time driving around looking at neighborhoods. And I spent much time online looking at homes for sale, condos for sale, townhouses for sale. Before I decided to buy, I looked at rentals all over this area. Close to the mountains - south of Rio Rancho but north of 40. Places I can afford and places I cannot afford. In the long run, I narrowed it down to a neighborhood. As I was online, looking, I received an email from a realtor saying I was looking at her site so why not make an appointment and let her show some of these homes. After thinking a week, I decided to let her show me homes. At this point, this is what she knew about me I had a first name, and an email address (not the one I use here at church). I told her I would meet her but she insisted I come to her office. I arrived at the appointed time. We looked at four condos and I made an offer on one. On returning to the office to write the offer, the agent said “You realize you have to give me your last name so I can write the contract.” Fear of joining runs deep. Somehow, however, I have come to think like Paul: if I don’t join, then I lose much. My soul. So on Sunday this past Sunday I joined St. Paul’s United Church of Christ as its new pastor. I am called to lead this congregation through a scary process of revitalization. In my darkest moments, I remember that Paul started churches and Jesus was merely trying to revitalize the zealots of his. I have started a church and am now revitalizing - revitalization is more challenging. As new church planter, I had all leeway to do what I thought best. As revitalizer, I have 78 opinions to consider. Actually, there may not still be 78 as a few have left, not liking where we are going. I tell them I read my job description, but that does not change the movement out-of-comfort-zone-to-uncharted-territory. Some know if there is no change, the church will close, but it would be a couple years from now and there could, quite possibly, be a miracle that saves the church. If the congregation pursues change, it could lead to the closing of the church, but then we are not leaving room for the people who used to fill the pews to return. I empathize. But press forward. I take heart in the fact that at least two-thirds of the congregation supports the direction chosen by the whole congregation. As new member, I have as much to loose as the longest term member. My church. I feel so strongly that if we do nothing, we lose everything, that I am willing to take the chance of uncharted change and growth. One hopes. And prays. A friend reminded me to always consider God in my blog. Here is my consideration: each day, I pray for guidance, for help, for kindness and understanding, and courage to lead this congregation forward. When people tell me they want to talk to God, I try to remind them that after talking, the next part - the hardest part - is listening. I listen and hope the thoughts that come into my head are what God is saying. Even as revitalizer, I take a back seat to God.

where did this post go?

Picking my brain for a suitable topic for today’s blog, all I can come up with is the thought that congregations as like the total society, with issues and concerns and individuals who respond differently to life. This was so clear this week of national concerns and personal issues. Our national concern. the 10th anniversary of 9/11, saw me making sure that our worship service reflected our concern for the victims (living and dead) of the disasters as well as concern for our country. At the same time, I wanted to raise awareness of the insanity that followed, and the vilification of all Muslims, painting them with the same brush because some extremist groups wish America ill. Our congregation is blessed to have a family of Iranian descent worship with us regularly. I wanted to be certain that this family was seen in a positive light by all of us, so I asked one family member to be part of the sermon. She was wonderful. The blending of myriad cultures in our nation does enrich the lives of each of us. On a more individual level, one family struggles with so many issues that I cannot understand how they shoulder the burdens. This family, as one blow after another strikes them, pulls closer together, supporting each other in ways I marvel at. I can only pray for them and hope the prayers offered by this congregation gives strength to each of them. However, I was able to do one more thing. In our congregation, we name people who need our prayers and include them in the morning prayer. But I am not sure that the prayers offered are taken home with worshippers and prayed during the week. So, I asked one woman, who turns out to be a good pray-er to initiate a prayer chain that can be activated at any time and will continue as long as the request for prayer continues. It is a small thing. But, I think, powerful. In our church we don’t pray for miracle healing, but for strength and comfort. Specially asking for comfort for a person in need seems like a powerful tool. I don’t know that prayer always helps. But I do know it cannot hurt. As a sociologist cum theologist I am reminded that personal issues are so influenced by what happens nationally. Does what happens individually influence the national? I wish I could think it does.

Ah, Work

After three Sundays at St. Paul’s I find myself so excited about this church revitalization and transformation that I want to run myself ragged by trying too many different ideas at a time. Here are early thoughts:

Worship growth: In worship I started out right off “doing a new thing” - as a statement to visitors who come as much as a statement to those who have been part of this congregation for many years. We are going down a different road. It has started smoothly, not full of ruts or wagon tracks, no boulders in the path to pry out with huge tree-trunks. Perhaps the addition of a singing bowl soothes us all.

Quick Changes: Before the first day, I thought of the pastor who came to the church and saw that the piano was in the wrong place. So, the pastor moved it to the pulpit side of the church. On Sunday, people noticed the change and were not pleased and started a movement to have the pastor removed. After some time, a new pastor was called. First Sunday, the pastor noticed the piano was in the wrong place, and moved it an inch. Eventually the piano was moved to the place the first pastor had selected, but it took a couple of years.

Changing our community: We don’t have time to move the piano by the inch if we are to be successful in revitalizing ourselves into a progressive Christian community - the vision the congregation seeks. I hear that we were considered one of the most conservative congregations in the area. If we go slowly no will notice the difference, yet I remember that when change happens too quickly, people feel out of balance (and out of sorts). Finding that right balance is a bit tricky - one person likes the singing bowl, while another likes the sanctuary arts we have implemented and yet another want nothing to change.

Balance beam: When a congregation member offers a suggestion, I mull it over and see how balance can be achieved. I am short and was told that not all could see me during the sermon. So rather than stand on the lowest level to preach, I now stand up high - but still not near the pulpit and not in a robe and still, generally, without a script. I prefer to be on the same level as the congregation so we see eye-to-eye as it were, but I can walk down to eye level then go back up. That way, even the tiniest person can see me. I remember to thank God that they want to see me.

Who is God calling us to be? Balance is more than worship - balance in taking strides that keep us going forward while we assess where we are. Though we have not yet discerned who God is calling the congregation to be, we have started to do some active outreach to the community. I think that our activity will not hurt us and may even help us in the long run. Eventually, though, we need to be of one mind as we offer ourselves, our programs and our church to the greater Albuquerque community.

In the past, this blog was about my transition from a city dweller to a rural pastor. As I grow into God’s vision for me, I find myself more comfortable as a pastor in a city environment - wondering at the insects that walk on the pavement and don't their tiny feet get hot? and looking toward church revitalization in an area of western thinking - conservative but peppered with rays of hope illuminated by sunshine. So much sunshine.

Getting back to work

It is Thursday, and quite a few Tuesdays have passed since I last blogged. I am pleased to say that I think I may be back on track. Tuesdays will be blogging in early morning after I get to the office. And after I take a minute to sit in the sanctuary and say a prayer.

At this point, I have settled into my apartment as much as I will. The 910 square feet turns out to be way too small – and is arranged in ways that do not suit my life. I have signed a seven month lease, so am biding my time. The apartment complex runs with the Bosque, a God’s place in this New Mexico high desert if ever there was one. I walk this area some mornings and wonder where all the water comes from. I know that our apartment complex coaxes green grass much more than I am comfortable with – even in Pennsylvania, we were concerned about water usage.

Another sight that impresses me as I walk on the Bosque are birds. On Tuesday morning, a local hummer fluttered around me for at least two minutes. I stood still (as in a tai chi bamboo-in-the-wind pose) the tiny wings flapped and the long beak investigated whether I was a source of food or not (not). With my eyes, I looked to see if there were flowers around and I saw none, though after I started walking again, I noticed tiny blue flowers barely sticking out of earth crushed by footprints of runners and walkers. I marveled at the smallness of the flowers and that I had not noticed them as I meditated – what ever happened to Thich Naht Hanh’s reminder about walking with mind attending to surroundings. The hummer left me to find food at a close flower and then I started noticing other birds (swallows ? - I really need a NM bird guide) that were dive-bombing the running water. There were a few goldfinches too.

Speaking of birds, early my first Sunday in NM, but not my first Sunday at church, I walked to church and went in the open door. No one saw me at 6:15 (the door was open because an early group gathers) so I wandered around this new church I am called to pastor. There to greet me was a roadrunner – trapped by the huge glass windows and desperately trying to find a way out. I tried to help, but without success. The poor bird was terrified and kept hopping around. She must have found the open door, because I have not seen her since.

New Mexico is an awesome place. The high desert lives up to the name “Land of Enchantment” and except for the total lack of rain, is pretty awesome. It would be foolish to expect much rain in a desert, but we need some. This season of the year is billed as “monsoon” season. From many years in Colorado, I remember arroyos filled with boiling, rolling water at least two to three times each year. A friend came from Colorado Springs and we went to the Indian Pueblo Cultural Center while she visited for the day. We stayed to see the dancing demonstration at 2PM. We sat in shade, the two dancers were in the scorching sun. The lead dancer addressed a question about “rain dances” and responded that all dances are rain dances. Rain is so crucial to every aspect of life that asking the gods for rain every chance is a prime concern. We could make it one of ours. Water keeps us alive – even much water at a time can be managed. A public service announcement here reminds Albuquerque residents that a tremendous water system keeps this city alive. It also reminds locals that we are responsible for keeping water clean.

So – thoughts spanning several Tuesdays from New Mexico. In all, I find that God has been so good to me by giving me this call to St. Paul’s United Church of Christ in Rio Rancho New Mexico. I try to follow Meister Eckhart’s advice when I pray "If the only prayer you said in your whole life was, "thank you," that would suffice." So, I say thank you to God, daily.